LITTLE MISS ENDO

Friday, April 23, 2010



When I was little, my Aunt Christy had the most impressive collection of Little Miss & Mr. Men books by Roger Hargreaves. They are my favorite childhood books. Today as I sat here in pain, I was looking for a way to turn my frown upside. Here's what I came up with:

I present to you my friendos, my very own collection of Little Miss Endo.

Little Miss Heating Pad~No adventures for her. She has to stay plugged in after all, so she can't stray far from the wall. She's often curled up in the fetal position. Not the most exciting book.

Her cousin Little Miss Microwaveable Heating Pad is pretty boring too. She constantly has to reheat her pad & drinks lots of cold tea to reduce the heating-pad-induced sweats.

Little Miss Migraine~Poor girl, everything makes her head pound: sound, light, movement, touch. She can barely function. Sometimes it even makes her vomit.

Little Miss Horrid Cramps~It's impossible to be comfortable when enduring stomach & back cramps. She's screwed. She can barely walk and don't be surprised if she doubles over in pain. Don't misunderstand, she's a tough cookie. But everybody has a limit.

Little Miss Putrid Gas~There's no politely holding these in folks. When they bubble up, she's gotta let 'em out. They'll make you gag & run, no doubt. She may try to implicate Mr. Dog. He doesn't mind taking one for the team because he senses her pain.
 
Little Miss Weepy~Even the stupidest of commercials will make her sob. She craves a good chick flick. Indulge her & give her a hug. She might get your shirt wet, but it will dry.

Little Miss Wino~She often slurs her words, but she seems to be the happiest Little Miss Endo.

Little Miss Pissy~Just bring her dark chocolate & let her be. Anything else will just piss her off anyway. (That doesn't mean you didn't do something infuriating, by the way, so don't blame her for everything).

Little Miss Out of Sick Days~It sucks to be her, because she's forced to suffer AND be at work. She feels obligated to fake a smile and pretend like she's fine. It's exhausting. If only she could take a nap in the conference room without getting caught.

Little Miss Rage~She's angry, but can you blame her? She feels terrible. I love that she doesn't take crap from anybody. Even Mr. Tickle knows he better keep his long-ass arms away from her. Because unfortunately, right now, nothing is funny.

Little Miss Bloated~Her comfy pajama pants are her most treasure possession. Sometimes, she can't zip up her jeans, and that makes her sad. So she just wears her pjs for the entire story. They are really cute; I want a pair.

Little Miss Relieved~She finally stops bleeding & can return to skipping around with her buddy Little Miss Sunshine once again. Well, at least for now, that is. Their periods have synced up, so they make a harmonious duo.


I'd love to hear your Little Miss Endo comments & character suggestions!

7 comments:

ficwriter said...

Your post is so creative. I love it but hate that you are suffering my sweet girl. Great job on today's blog. (I'm taking a short break from festival but am preparing to head back out there.)

Jenn said...

Thank you! Have some festival fun for me!

Alanna Klapp said...

This is a RIOT!!!! I laughed the entire time I read this and then I had tears streaming from my eyes and those wonderful stomach cramps that come from belly laughs. I laughed so long and so hard Mark started laughing even though he didn't know what I was laughing at. I LOVE it!!! It sucks you are dealing with this, but I'm glad you've found such a creative and funny way of coping. I just love your writing and your humor!!!!

Jenn said...

Thank you Little Miss Alanna! :)

I'm so happy you enjoyed it!! That was just what I was going for.

Don't you just love when a laugh is so contagious that someone else will start cracking up, just from your laugh? Especially Mark's booming laugh! Yay!

Thanks for your support & stopping by the blog.

Your Friendo,
Little Miss Jenn

Alanna Klapp said...

Little Miss Jenn, I do love that, thanks for providing it!
Always & Forever Your Friendo,
Little Miss Alanna
:)

Elodie said...

Hey Jenn!
I found your blog randomly; and i'm so glad i did. Thanks for making my crampy day a bit more fun! Every post i read so far, i was like "ohh that's just like me!", between the jacuzzi and sudoku and hoopin and milkshakes. Weird!

xo Another out-of-sick-days tough cookie

Jenn said...

Hey Elodie!

I'm sooo happy you found my blog & I helped make a crampy day a little better!! :)

Sounds like we have a lot in common! (in fun & not-so-fun ways). It helps knowing I'm not alone.

Thank you so much for leaving your comment! I hope you come back & we can continue to chat.

Sorry to hear you are out of sick days, I know how much that sucks.

xo Take care,
Little Miss Jenndo