Thursday, May 13, 2010

Hey friendos! You are never going to believe this but...my surgery was CANCELED. So I'm doing fine, at least physically.

I thought I had prepared & thought of every possible scenario. Well, I was wrong. Everything started off fine. I was admitted, put on my gown, had my IV in place. I was listening to my guided imagery, feeling calm & ready. My nurse informed me that my surgery was going to be delayed one or two hours. I was disappointed, but figured I would just use the time to listen to my guided imagery. When the nurses had me prepped, my husband came back to wait with me.

My nurse moved us to a room with a TV since our wait was extended. Then she came back & said my doctor was on the phone & needed to speak with me. That's when my stomach dropped. I knew he did not have good news. He explained there were issues with the surgery before mine & it was expected to take several hours longer than expected. The hospital only has one robotic laparoscopy machine, and therefore my surgery was likely going to have to be rescheduled. I couldn't believe what I was hearing! My first thought was the torturous bowel prep that I endured the day before. How could that have been for nothing? And how could I force myself to do it again? I looked desperately at my husband & gave him the thumbs down sign. His face, his entire body, sank. I started to cry. How could I just get dressed & go home? I couldn't!

We decided to wait another half hour & reassess at that time. My empty stomach growled. I hadn't taken my pain medication since midnight & was in severe pain. I talked my doctor into giving me something for my pain while I waited. Forty-five minutes later, he called again. Surgery today was an impossibility. He apologized. He said he never had to cancel a surgery before. This did not make me feel better. I looked at my husband & cried some more.

I wanted to yell, but at who? It wasn't anyone's fault & no one was happy about the situation. I thought about the woman who was in surgery & prayed for her. I could only imagine the seriousness of her situation & what she was going through.

I explained to my doctor that I was likely going to lose my job over this. I have already used all of my FMLA time, and my work had given me a thirty day extension as an "accommodation." I was scheduled to return to work on May 23rd. They could have legally fired me when my FMLA ran out. They have no legal obligation to allow me any more time off. I carry my health insurance with them; if I lose my job, I lose my health insurance. He said he would have the head nurse come to speak to me. She provided me with documentation regarding what had occurred. I can only hope it will be enough for me to keep my job & insurance.

So I had my IV removed, got dressed & left the hospital. My husband took me for a quiet, delicious lunch. We talked & tried to stay positive. It must have happened for a reason. Maybe something terrible would've happened to me if I had surgery today. I looked for the blessing in disguise & trusted God was looking out for us.

My new surgery date is June 9th. Four more weeks! There is a small chance he will have a cancellation before then, but it's very unlikely. I have to wrap my head around four more weeks of this life. I have no choice but to stay positive & wait. 


Alanna Klapp said...

I'm so sorry. I agree with you that everything happens for a reason. Trust in God that he is taking care of you, and will continue to take care of you. We'll pray for a more positive outcome on June 9th!

Jenn said...

Thanks Alanna! Your prayers bring me comfort. :)

Jeanne said...


"The waiting is the hardest part" ~~ Tom Petty

That pretty much sums it up, huh?

I'm SO sorry your surgery got delayed! :(

When you first posted this, I saw it but was very pressed for time and didn't have time to post a comment because I was about to bolt out the door.

It has been hectic since (to say the least) and I'm sorry it took so long to make it back over here.

I can't imagine doing all of the preparation you did and making it to having an IV and everything... and then having it be canceled.

Hopefully your job will not be endangered by this delay but, again, everything happens for a reason. I know that sounds like a cliche but I totally believe it.

Over the years when some pretty terrible things have happened to me, I have later been able to look back and see that in the long-run it was better they unfolded the way they did.

I am a big believer in "everything happens for a reason". I know June 9th seems like forever away but hang in there!! :)


Jenn said...

Thank you so much Jeanne!

I have made peace with the situation & keep looking for the positive. Friends like you really help me keep it together. :)

One week has already gone by, so just three more to go! It will be here before I know it.

I hope you are doing well!